Of course not, I'm a Criminal

Rules of Conduct

Threads

I'm open to multiple threads with one person! If we've got plot ideas, let's do it! I'll generally use minimal formatting. I don't expect you to follow my formatting, but don't expect me to follow yours if it's super stylized. PLEASE DO NOT USE SUPER TINY TEXT. I'm old I can't read that shit. [small] is fine, but not double-small. Most threads will be paragraph/novel format or multi-para. I will generally be mutuals-only, but I will look at your blog if you follow me.

Memes & Asks

Meme me up, Scotty! If I reblog a meme, I want memes!! I'll try to send at least one to you if I reblog from you! Memes are open to everyone, regardless of mutual status, but I may not respond to all of them, it is up to my discretion. I love ask memes being turned into threads, just please do so in a separate post, don't reblog the ask.

Godmodding/Power Play

Godmodding won't be tolerated. I do understand that as my character has a lot of abilities, he can often run the risk of god-modding. I will do my best to ensure this never happens. Talk to me OOC if you think he's doing too much. The only time I'll allow any sort of this is if it's a fight and I know the person I'm playing against well. I'm protective of my children(a grown man who is older than me is my child shush), and don't let others take control unless I know I can trust them. I will also ask before I do anything big in any thread we may have. If you want to have your character have prior knowledge, I’m super happy to talk about it OOC and figure out a relationship!

Shipping

Shipping will always and forever be based on C H E M I S T R Y. If he likes the person, he likes them, and they may become a ship. If he doesn't, he will let you know. He may sleep around, but having sex does not necessarily mean he will be in a relationship with your character. Open to poly ships as well.

Plotting

Always up to plot! Inbox/PM me and we can talk. DON’T force me into plots/ships/etc that don’t flow well. I’m up for trying just about anything, but if it doesn’t seem to work, please don’t try to force it. I am a hugely nice person but I don’t take kindly to being forced into something. DO push boundaries with my character. Make him uncomfortable! Just don’t force things or bring any sort of drama from OOC into IC.

AUs & Crossovers

Definitely always up for that. I don't know that I'll know your character's verse off the top of my head, but I'm willing to learn, and this can be talked about OOC

Follow Backs

I love y'all, but don't expect me to follow you back just because you followed me. I am selective with who I play with. I’ll make some open starters for everyone, but I may not reply to all the responses I get. I reserve the right to follow back or not. If you follow me, rest assured, I WILL look at your blog. If I like you/your character, I'll follow you. I do not roleplay with multi-muse blogs. It confuses me too much, I'm sorry!

NSFW & Triggers

This blog will be rife with NSFW and trigger-related things. I will try to tag all the big ones with "trigger tw" or "trigger cw". Violence, murder, sex, and possible torture will happen on this blog, but I will never post photos of gore. Please tag gore for me. I will not roleplay sexual situations with anyone or anyone's character who is under 18 years of age. Period, end of. DO tell me if you want me to tag for anything. I am empathetic to triggers and don’t want to make our pretendy funtimes anything but fun.

The Mun

I'm Erick, I'm an old damn man, but I love roleplaying. I'm very friendly so please don't hesitate to message me!! Mutuals are welcome to my skype, I'm on it a lot! feel free to message me! I love talking OOC, for plotting or just for fun chats! I love making new friends on both sides of the RPing world :3 Just be aware that I have a more than full time job (50+ hours/week), and this is my escape from that, but sometimes I have other things I need to attend to. I’ll get back to you as soon as I can, I promise. Sometimes I do forget! Feel free to poke me about a thread, but don’t poke me repeatedly, that will make me want to reply less. DO know that I’m not intimidating even if I seem it(I’ve gotten that a lot). I’m a big teddy bear, I don’t bite!!
DO communicate with me. Need me to do something? Want to drop a thread? Going on a hiatus? Want to shower me with praise? Just message me! Keep me in the loop, please! I’ve had lots of experiences with people just disappearing, and I consider every RPer I play with to be a friend. I don’t like friends just disappearing, I am fine with people having real life things happen, but just keep the communication lines open, okay? Don’t be afraid to tell me anything.

Credits & Disclaimers

I don't own Red Reddington or The Blacklist, nor am I affiliated with anyone who does. This is all just for fun!

BASICS

Name: Raymond Reddington
Codename: ????
Nicknames: Red, Ray, innumerable aliases
Age: 57.
Birthdate: February 7, 1960
Species: Human
Gender: Male
Orientation: Pansexual (Prefers women)
Profession: Criminal

PHYSICAL ASPECTS

Hair: Brown
Eyes: Blue
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 190

SKILLS

Abilities: Armed forces training; quick-talker; fast thinker; manipulator; well connected; has friends in high and low places; skilled with various conventional and unconventional forms of weaponry and improvised weapons; connections to spies, thieves, smugglers, drug traffickers, people smugglers, human traffickers, arms traffickers, counterfeiters, forgers, hackers, mercenaries, and assassins; Ultimate deal-maker; Evading the government.
Hobbies:Selling secrets, influencing geopolitics, screwing with things, changing the world because he feels like it.

TRAITS

Positive: Cunning, Persistent, intelligent
Negative: Ruthless, borderline sociopathic, selfish

LIKES

Colors: Blues, Browns
Smells: Rain, Coffee, Bourbon
Textures: Cotton, Silk, wool
Drinks: Bourbon, wine, water

OTHER DETAILS

Smokes: No
Drugs: No
Driver License: Yes
Ever Been Arrested?:Yes

BIOGRAPHY

Raymond "Red" Reddington was born February 7th, 1960 in Massachussets. He grew up and attended the Naval Academy, graduating top of his class. A few years after he was being groomed for an Admiral position, he vanished without a trace. Four years later, he resurfaced as a criminal, a major player with ties to many underworld factions. All the intelligence he'd gathered in the Navy was now for sale, and he quickly established himself as a dangerous force for law enforcement, as he could sell top secret information to the highest bidder. For the next 20 years, he sat on the FBI's Ten Most Wanted list, wanted for Sabotage; Destruction of Government property; Conspiracy; Unlawful flight to avoid prosecution; Violent crimes in aid of racketeering; Rico violations; Weapons violations, and other things.

Out of nowhere, he surrendered himself ot the FBI, offering to help them catch the world's most dangerous criminals they don't even know exist. He's curated a Blacklist of these people and will help, but only if his primary point of contact is new agent Elizabeth Keen.

Verses

Added as they come. Main verse will remain untagged, and there may be a clickable link in here once I actually get a Full Verses Page set up. I'm okay with multiple threads with the same character(s) being in the same verse, and if there needs to be a different verse for whatever reason, I will tag it as such. I'll default to my main-verse unless there's something that makes that unfeasible. I love AUs but unless there's a reason, each character will probably be in their own verse.

Post season 4 verse:SPOILERS PRESENT IN THIS VERSE

Default verse, untagged: Pre- Season 4 - Red is still working with the FBI and still has access to all of his assets and people, Mr. Kaplan is his cleaner, etc etc. “life as usual”, basically.

Post Season 4: Abyssus, Abyssum Invocat(Post s4) With his empire falling down around him, he's left almost entirely illiquid. He's been hobbled, and he's lost most of 30 years of hard work. Though he is still himself, and he's got to find a way to get back on top. Spoiler-heavy, as once season 5 premieres, this verse will be up to date with the currently airing episodes.

General supernatural AU: I have eyes and ears everywhere (Supernatural AU). Before computers, before automobiles, before even the dinosaurs, there was the primordial essence. It broke off in facets and as time went on, they became people, creatures whose names have now become infamous: Puck, or Robin Goodfellow, Aether, Erebus, et cetera…and Red. Throughout the centuries, the millennia, he went under many names, but always had one, singular purpose: To do fulfill his own desires. He built up empires, helped others to topple, as long as he was the quiet, hidden puppet-master, all was well. As technology advanced, so did his tactics, he learned many things from many people, and his powers only increased, for people crying out for justice, or crying about the lack thereof? Those cries fed him, grew him, kept him powerful.

Red is a Primordial being, one of the oldest of the Fae, and as such, he is immortal–or nigh-on, though Iron does hurt him. He has the power to grant wishes, but they never come without a price, and he is incredibly skilled at misdirection, and has physiology, enhanced dexterity, agility, strength, and durability. He can also summon things, and though he can summon almost anything he wants, he tends to hide his true nature unless the situation necessitates his revealing it. What fun is the world when you can get whatever you want without having to work for it?

American Gods AU: Said the fly to the spider (AmGod AU): Shortly after he turned traitor and sold the United States intelligence secrets to the highest bidder, an attempt was made on his life. He nearly died, but not before a strange, loquacious man came to him in what felt like a dream. When he awoke, renewed, he knew something was different. After Raymond’s first sleep out of the hospital, the words, the sense of purpose came to him in another dream: He had been saved for a reason, he was the God of Criminals, one who knew how to help anyone who lived between the cracks, in the seedy underbelly of the world. He found himself able to slip away undetected, and able to withstand much more than an average human.

Marvel/Super AU: The fickle nature of man (Marvel AU) Little changes from the main universe, but Red is no mere mortal. He was captured once, while still in the navy, and when these men had him, they tortured, but they also gave him something, to see what he would do with it. Red now has a few abilities. Low-level teleportation, he can move from room to room, or down the block, but he can't teleport anywhere in the world. It's got a limit of a few miles at most. He can become intangible to reach objects behind glass, or to pass through walls to evade capture, and he can also will objects to him, but they cannot be a great distance away(same couple mile radius). He has hyper-enhanced senses/abilities which includes it being harder to actually injure him, but for example if someone like Wolverine can heal a broken arm in a few minutes, it takes Red a few hours. Lastly, he has some low level glamour/morphing abilities. He can't go full mystique level morph, but he can make his face/gender different, though he can't change his eyes. All these have aided him in becoming the Concierge of Crime.

“The Onion” article title sentence meme

phoenixiism:

ask-meme-addicts:
❝ Zing! I just got you with another one of my trademark ‘complete lies’. ❞
❝ Is this a picture of the internet? ❞
❝ I always thought losing your sunglasses was something that happened to other people. ❞
❝ When I die my entire fortune will be donated to charity, except the $40 billion I will have buried with me. ❞
❝ One time I punched a goose right out of the air. ❞
❝ I will drink every last drop of water on earth. ❞
❝ I know heaven is real because I saw it and abducted an angel. ❞
❝ Sometimes I feel like things would be better off if I never existed. ❞
❝ Whenever I feel sad, I just go down to the wreck of the titanic. ❞
❝ Please, make yourself at home while I silently count down the seconds until you leave. ❞
❝ I’m always open to feedback that I can get defensive about and ultimately ignore. ❞
❝ When I need strength, I turn to the bible or whatever else is around. ❞
❝ So help me God, I’m going to eat one of those multicolored detergent pods. ❞
❝ I wish I could get through to you with a sports analogy, young man. ❞
❝ God has kind of a loose outline for us all. ❞
❝ After another incredible summer, it’s time to put my shirt back on. ❞
❝ You really don’t know who people are until you make a vicious snap judgment about them. ❞
❝ If another country ever started calling itself America, I’d be so pissed. ❞
❝ I’d like to see the government try and take away my trash. ❞
❝ If you want to date my daughter, you’re going to have to date me first. ❞
❝ The only way to get over your fear of the moon is to walk on it. ❞
❝ A woman as beautiful and intoxicated as yourself shouldn’t be drinking alone, my dear. ❞
❝ Aw, fer crying out loud! ❞
❝ I only like movies where the whole cast dances in a little box next to the end credits. ❞
❝ Looking back on my life, I guess my biggest regret is trying to fight that alligator 5 minutes ago. ❞
❝ You might be wondering why I’m wearing a cap usually reserved for playing baseball. ❞
❝ As a failure, I’ve learned to appreciate the little things in life. ❞
❝ How about we go outside and settle this like emotionally stunted men? ❞

⨷ ⨷ ⨷ ⨷ ⨷

# it's good business (memes)

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